Monday, June 9, 2008

Potty Time

This weekend my running club put on a huge running race. We estimated that there were 10,000 people that either participated or came out to the event. Crazy, huh!? I was responsible for resale of our club's merchandise.

Jude came with us, of course. I like to wake him up at 4:30 AM every now and then just to torture the poor kid. I'm just kidding... but I do like for him to suffer right along with us. We have been taking Jude to running events since he was about 9 months old. Waking him up at the butt crack of dawn a couple of times a year, so that we can volunteer our time, teaches Jude a good lesson, I think. It teaches him that the world doesn't revolve around him. And, it teaches him that we have to give back our time and energy to our community to make it better. I know he can't grasp that concept yet, but soon enough. I hope someday he will realize that he, too, will need to give back to his community.

Anywho, so Jude brought some Matchbox cars to play with, and I brought his portable DVD player with the usually suspects: Thomas the Tank Engine, Cars Movie, Curios George, etc. We was very well behaved as usual. But, he kept drinking juice boxes and having to go pee. Thankfully, since we were volunteers, we were not forced to stand in the 30 minute line to use the port-o-pots. We were able to use a real Western style toilet located inside a gym. So, about every 30 minutes or so, Jude had to go pee. So, we would run as fast as we could and go potty. This happened about 6 times. Then, he says "Mommy, I need to go make poo-poo!" Great, I think. Couldn't he have pooped this morning at 4:30 AM at home instead of having to go here?? Of course NOT!! So, we run to the gym to go potty. Turns out that they were letting the Japanese women runners use the indoor restroom because the line for the port-o-pots was about 30 minutes long and the race was about to start. So, I did what any good mom would have done...I asked to use the men's restroom because there was no line. I asked another volunteer to keep men out until I came out. Apparently, that volunteer didn't get the memo!

Keep in mind, Jude can pee by himself but he can't poop by himself, yet. He has a hard time wiping. Last time he said he could do it by himself, and he ended up just smearing poop all over his butt and back. It was totally disgusting. So, I put him in the Handicap Stall and just stood their waiting for him to finish. Like most little boys and some men, my son takes FOREVER to poop. It 's like he enjoys hanging out with the vile stench to try and figure out what he has eaten over the last few days. NASTY!! So, after about 5 minutes, he tells me to go away. I open the stall door to walk out, and I catch my neighbor peeing at the urinal. I apologize and quickly shut the door and stayed with Jude in the stall. I was so embarrassed! I waited another minute or 2 and then tried to get out of the stall again. This time, there were 3 Japanese men standing at the urinals peeing. Apparently, the volunteer that had been standing at the restroom door got tired of waiting for us and let men go in the men's restroom. BASTARD!! So, after I wiped Jude and flushed, we opened the door and ran out as fast as we could. I ran like I was being chased by the Texas Chainsaw Massacre dude! I just closed my eyes and ran to the ladies restroom as fast as I could. I figured that if I didn't see who was peeing at the urinal, I wouldn't be embarrassed if I saw them again later in the day. Jude washed his hands in the women's restroom, and we walked out like nothing had happened.

Just another day in Weenie's World.

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