Everyone Poops

...except I do it at 2:29 AM in the effing morning! And, yes, I'm awake. I should be sleeping and dreaming of William Shatner. Instead, I'm awake, telling you I'm awake!

So, my bowels woke me up, and I had to poo. Why is it that my body feels the need to expel waste when I'm trying to sleep? WTF? Why can't I just sleep and wake up and poo like everyone else on the planet? Why do MY bowels need to be emptied at 2:30 AM? Seriously, people! This is quite aggravating. This could be caused by all the high fiber, fresh fruits, and veggies I've been eating the last few days. Or it could be caused by my recent burst in exercise: I did Cindy Crawford workout video on Monday and then Power Yoga yesterday. Actually, I think it may be the combination of healthy foods and exercise. But if this is what I get for being healthy, then I'd rather eat a bunch of crap and be a fat, lazy, midget, Mexican. Maybe then I could get some sleep, and I wouldn't have to poo at 2:30 in the freaking morning!

Jeez!