I certainly don't feel like an inspirational person. I've never done anything grand. I mean, sometimes I'm a decent human being with feelings, emotions, and all that crap. But most of the time, I'm just mean, bossy and bitchy.
However, yesterday I had 2 moments where I was called inspirational. (I know, weird!) At one point, I thought the ground was going to crack open and suck me in, to never be seen again. Like all my goodness had been used up, and now I was going to go back into the fiery pits of hell where I belong with all the other hell raisers! But the ground didn't open up, so back to my story:
The first instance of inspiration was simply a phone call from an old friend. I simply encouraged an old, dear friend to work hard and get more out of life. That's all. I mentioned that I thought my friend deserved more out of life than what they currently had. That's all. That's all I did! Then, my friend thanked me for giving them the push they needed. Holy crap, can I actually make a difference in someones life, I thought to myself. Can a midget, Mexican momma actually encourage someone to expect more from themselves, I wondered. Holy shit, I can use my powers for good! I nearly crapped my pants.
The second instance happened at the doctor's office. I had an appointment with my asthma doctor for my annual asthma check-up. They use a little machine to see if my condition is worse, the same, or better. During our discussion, my doc asked if I was exercising. I mentioned that I was in a lull and not really exercising much. He started to give me a lecture about exercise and its benefits for asthmatics, but I cut him off. I told him that at the end of August, I will start training for my third marathon. Yes, I said THIRD MARATHON. His jaw dropped, and his eyes bugged out. This was our conversation:
The doc: "You run marathons?" he asked with a perplexed look in his eyes.
Weenie: "Yes, I've completed 2 marathons and will start training for the 3rd one next month," I replied.
The doc: "Wait, YOU run marathons? Wow, you are inspirational," he said with a shocked look on his face.
Weenie: "When my asthma is in control, I really enjoy running with my friends," I replied back. "It's like therapy when I run," I told him.
The doc: "You have what we call moderately severe asthma. You are on high doses of steroids. Wow! You are what we hope all asthma patients can achieve or become. Do you mind if I use your story to encourage other asthma patients who come to the clinic?" he asked me.
Weenie: "That's fine, I guess," I told him, slightly confused. I didn't think I was a big deal.
The doc: "I don't think you understand. People like you (severe asthmatics) aren't supposed to do marathons. At least that's what they tell us in medical school. My goal, as your doctor, is to help you lead a normal life. To lead a life with very few asthma symptoms. But you have gone beyond that. You have achieved something I can't even accomplish and I have a normal, disease free body. Wow! You really are an inspiration," he said.
Weenie: "Oh, well, okay, " I replied.
I was shocked that the doc called ME an inspiration. All I know is I'm not willing to let a little thing like asthma control my life. I'm in control, remember? Maybe it's my OCD or my unwillingness to be controlled by anything or anyone. Whatever it is, I never thought it was a big deal. But apparently it is.
So, don't fuck with me, I'm an inspiration! I can kick your non-inspirational ass!
Remember, I don't have to use my powers for good!