Sleepy time or not?

Our plan has failed. Our brilliant plan has been foiled by the 4 year old monkey (Jude, duh!). We (Husband and I) had it all planned out: no nap for Jude, extra play time at the park, riding bikes, Toy Story 2, and sushi for dinner. Our plan: keep the kid extra busy, so he will go to sleep early, and mommy and daddy can have some married couple time together.



It worked out great until dinner time at our favorite sushi restaurant. Jude was so completely pooped that he was eating fried squid with half closed eyes. One minute he was comparing Ironman to Spider-man, and the next he was passed out on my lap as I ate sushi, trying not to spill rice or raw fish in his ear.



Since he was out like a light and snoring, I thought I would take advantage. You see, our favorite sushi joint is located inside the local mall. Husband parked himself on the comfy couch outside the GAP, holding our sleeping monkey, and I took a peek inside the store. To my surprise, the store was empty. It was weird, almost eerie to be alone in the GAP. Usually the place is streaming with skinny Japanese ladies, who barely weigh 85 pounds. Usually the ladies are buzzing around like little, skinny mosquitoes. But, tonight nada-no one was in the store--just me and about 10 sales associates. I guess it's a sign of the times. Luckily, I found a pair of size 2 jeans that fit perfectly, and they were on sale. YAHOO! (Since most Japanese ladies are sickly thin, a size 2 is basically for the fat chicks. And, well, in Japan, I'm a fat chick!) So, I bought the jeans and rescued Husband from the couch.



We got in the car and drove home with our sleeping kiddo in the back seat. All was perfect. Then, we arrived home. As Husband scooped the monkey out of his car seat, the monkey perked up. It was like someone yelled, "Hey, there's Spider-man." The monkey was awake, wide eyed and bushy tailed. We came inside, put jammies on, and encouraged him to go to bed. It didn't work. Now Husband is reading countless books to a well rested, inquisitive, little monkey. The monkey shows no sign of sleepiness or fatigue. Damn it! Our plan has been foiled. Shit, shit, shit! Husband mentioned something about giving the monkey a little Gin or Rum to help with the situation. As good as that sounds, I would hate to encourage alcoholism in a child that is sure to have inherited the alcoholic gene from my side of the family. As you may recall, I come from a long line of great alcoholics! Great ones, I tell you! So, I don't want to be responsible for turning my monkey into an alcoholic at age 4. Instead, I'll wait and let him do it on his own, hopefully when he goes off to college.



(Wait, that sounds bad. I don't EVER want my son to become an alcoholic! I don't wish that on him. But, I'm a realist. I know what he comes from, and I know what I was, and I know what I could have been- another GREAT alcoholic! If I had kept practicing, I could have been right up there with the local wino sleeping under the Mandell Bridge on Highway 59 in Houston, Texas. Again, it's in our genetic make-up to drink mass quantities of alcohol until we pass out and piss ourselves. The gene is lurking inside of him, like a dormant illness, waiting for that first taste of beer or wine or cheap whiskey. Then, it will come alive, controlling him, begging him for more. I know what he can become. I've seen it. I've lived with it. I could NEVER wish that for my baby!)



So, now I sit here, writing. As much as I love to write about nothingness, I'd much rather be doing adult things with my hubby. Remember, he's been working night this week, and I miss his company. I desperately want to snuggle up to him and fall asleep in his arms, but, instead, the monkey is getting to do that. My kid is getting the attention I desperately want. Sounds lame doesn't it- that I want Husband's attention, but, instead, the kid is getting it. It almost makes me sound jealous, doesn't it?! And, what if I am?! Is that bad?! Is it bad to want to do very adult things with my incredibly sweet and sexy husband? Isn't that what married people are supposed to do? Most men would jump at the chance to snuggle and do their wives, right?!



I've heard of men being jealous of the attention their wives give to their children. But I've never heard of it the other way around. But, I do understand why Jude yearns for his dad's attention tonight. He didn't get to see his dad all week, and he missed him-just like I did. And now, we both desire Husband's attention. It's weird to be competing with my kid. Weird!



But now this is what will happen: Husband will read Jude another 10 books. Then, Husband will turn out the lights and snuggle with Jude. Eventually, Husband will fall asleep in Jude's room. I'll try to wake Husband and tell him to move to our bed where we can snuggle. He might move, but I doubt it. He's incredibly tired from working nights. If he does move, he'll shuffle his way to our bed and plop down on it like a fat guy doing a belly flop in the neighbor's pool. I'll try to snuggle up against him, but he won't be responsive. Instead, he'll be snoring or grinding his teeth. I'll be left alone with no one to comfort me. So, I'll turn to my book on the night stand. I'll join Edward, Bella and Jacob. And, I'll enjoy their company until I fall asleep.



That's what will happen...